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Episode 32: How Codependent Thinking Might Be Hurting Your Practice

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“I define codependent thinking as a mindset and a somatic way of relating to the world in which we chronically, unintentionally, and habitually source our sense of wellness, worth, and value from everything in the world other than ourselves,” explains Victoria Albina, Master Certified Somatic Life Coach, Nurse Practitioner, Meditation Guide, and Host of The Feminist Wellness podcast with over 20 years of experience working in health and wellness. When working as a nurse practitioner primarily in gastroenterology, Victoria realized there was a deeper root cause beneath what she was seeing on the GI map, and that was a lack of embodiment and a need for a mindset shift. 

She realized that many people are living with a codependent and scarcity mindset rather than being able to uphold healthy boundaries that bring the nervous system back into a state of safety.

When people are born, they are inherently aware of their own needs and are not shy in the least about asking for them. However, that all changes as we grow up and the opinions of others supersede what we know is best for our own bodies. When people are socialized to be codependent in the way that causes them to find the entirety of their self worth and validation from external sources, they tend to neglect their own needs and struggle with setting boundaries. Our inner-child lives inside our nervous systems and causes our bodies to react in ways based on past experiences. If medical professionals do not shift their mindsets away from codependent thinking, their practices and patients will suffer. Having good boundaries is good for both the physicians and their patients because it helps develop respect and trust. 

Codependent thinking can be a root cause of many health concerns. The best solution is to start retraining your body to respect necessary boundaries and learn to find a sense of self worth internally rather than relying on external sources. Tune into this week’s episode of The Catalyst to learn more about how codependent thinking can cause your nervous system to get stuck in a pattern of tension that can lead to burnout, gastrointestinal problems, and more.

About Victoria Albina, FNP, MPH:

Victoria Albina (she/her) is a Master Certified Somatic Life Coach, UCSF-trained Family Nurse Practitioner and Breathwork Meditation Guide with a passion for helping humans socialized as women realize that they are their own best healers by reconnecting with their bodies and minds, so they can break free from codependency, perfectionism and people-pleasing and reclaim their joy.

She is the host of the Feminist Wellness Podcast, holds a Masters degree in Public Health from Boston University School of Public Health and a BA in Latin American Studies from Oberlin College. Victoria has been working in health & wellness for over 20 years and lives on occupied Munsee Lenape territory in New York’s Hudson Valley.

In This Episode We're Talking About:

  • Learning to manage your mind to step out of codependent thinking
  • How looking to your patients to prove your worth to you is a painful cycle that you can stop by returning to your somatic wisdom
  • Your body, and your patients’ bodies, hold endless wisdom – the best supplements on earth won’t do much if your patients’ nervous system is a hot mess – start there and see what’s possible when you look at your patient in their wholeness
  • Mindset matters – your patient will never stop eating the things that inflame them if they’re living their lives to keep other people happy with them, because the second they get offered grandma’s cinnamon rolls, they’re going to stay yes because keeping her happy is more important than feeling well in their bodies.

Quotes:

  • “What I was really seeing as the root cause underneath the blastocysts, under the pylori, under the gut microbe, under what I saw on the GI map, was mindset and a lack of embodiment.” (4:38-4:51 | Victoria)

 

  • “When your life is constant lions on the savanna of this time, how can the gut function? How can the thyroid function? How can we have a healthy menstrual cycle? It is not possible when you live in tension.” (8:12-8:33 | Victoria)

 

  • “I define codependent thinking as a mindset and a somatic way of relating to the world in which we chronically, unintentionally, and habitually source our sense of wellness, worth, and value from everything in the world other than ourselves.” (17:16-17:38 | Victoria)

 

  • “Boundaries show us where we begin and someone else ends. And where someone else ends and we begin. It’s the space where I have control over my human animal and nothing else on this planet. And I get to voice what works for me and control me and only me. So I teach that we voice boundaries as, if you do X, I will do Y.” (20:31-20:58 | Victoria)

 

  • “Our inner child can be our most loving and valiant supporters. They can really have our backs. They can encourage us to make art, and to play, and to dance, and to sing and to be loving.” (29:39-29:50 | Victoria)

Links for this Episode:

Connect with Victoria Albina, FNP, MPH:

Connect with Dr. Lara Salyer:

Thank You For Listening!

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About The Catalyst Host, Dr. Lara Salyer:

I worked as a family physician for 15 years until burnout changed the trajectory of my career. I realized I wanted to start a holistic functional medicine practice in my rural hometown and made it happen. In addition to practicing functional medicine, I now mentor practitioners who are looking to change their paths in healthcare by using what I refer to as the “Catalyst Roadmap”. I share each step of this framework with listeners so that they may apply it to their careers, relationships, personal goals, and projects.